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How to visit family without losing it

No one said this was going to be easy.
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Healthline
 
 
Wellness Wire
 
 
Presented by   Zenni
 
 
In a Nutshell
I want to start off by saying that I really love my family. But while fulfilling in the long run, being around my mom, dad, and brother isn't always enjoyable in the moment. Let's just say I have to put out a lot of effort not to immediately regress from the *perfect* 32-year-old I am now to the angry 12-year-old I once was.
People, let me tell you, this is easier said than done! But it's totally possible. Below, I share some coping strategies that have proven especially helpful over the years.
But first, some more on how to feel good this time of year:
• 12 ways to create community when you're a family of one
• How to thrive this holiday season with your chosen family
• 15 life-changing books to spark hope and healing
Stay sharp,
Ginger Wojcik
Newsletter Editor, Healthline
 
 
  Written by Ginger Wojcik
November 20, 2023 • 4.5 min read
 
 
 
How I keep the peace when I'm home for the holidays
what's got us buzzing
How I keep the peace when I'm home for the holidays
There are plenty of legitimate reasons for not visiting your family for the holidays (or ever), especially if they cause you harm — physical, psychological, or otherwise.
But if you're like me, and you still want to see these humans you've been randomly assigned to, even if it inevitably means experiencing emotions you thought for sure you'd worked out in therapy by now, there are definitely ways to make this time more enjoyable.
  • Get your own place. I usually opt for the Motel 6 down the street, but rooms were going for $225 a night last year. Instead, I slept in my car in the driveway for 6 nights. Honestly, having even that amount of privacy made a huge difference for how I felt.
  • Prioritize exercise. I try to surf every day that I'm home, partially because exercise is one of the quickest, healthiest ways to keep stress low and get a nice mood boost.
  • Keep close tabs on your emotions. A crucial part of emotional regulation is being able to recognize emotions as they arise. When I'm home, I'm pretty much continuously checking in on my emotional state to put out any fires before they burn me out.
  • Know your triggers. Alcohol is a big problem in my family, so I've stopped drinking altogether while I'm home. Think back on past scenarios. Are there any patterns you've noticed that can be avoided in the future?
  • Don't lose perspective. Remember that these flawed, complicated people won't be around forever. It's possible there's a future version of yourself sitting around wishing you'd spent the effort to see family while you still had the chance. I think about this version of myself often, and it helps motivate me to put in the work.
Hate the holidays?
 
 
 
Great finds
Tune out, and tune in
 
 
 
Bose QuietComfort Earbuds II
Bose QuietComfort Earbuds II
Want to find some peace and quiet but getting your own place isn't in your budget? It may be worth investing in this high quality set of Bluetooth noise-canceling earbuds from Bose. These wireless buds eliminate the tangled headphone cord dilemma of old and come with different sized silicone tips so you can pick the most comfortable fit for your ears. You may not be able to control the chaos of a full house, but with a pair of nice earbuds, you can at least control how much of that chaos enters your ears.
Buy now
Every product we recommend has gone through either Healthline's or Optum Store's vetting processes. If you buy through links on this page, we may receive a small commission or other tangible benefit. Healthline has sole editorial control over this newsletter. Potential uses for the products listed here are not health claims made by the manufacturers. Healthline and Optum Store are owned by RVO Health.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Presented by   Zenni
 
 
Glasses to soothe your head pain
Spec-tacular
Glasses to soothe your head pain
For about 80% of people with migraine, photophobia — a hypersensitivity to light — can be difficult to deal with every day. Stepping outside on a sunny day or into bright grocery store lighting could be enough to bring on a migraine episode.
While over-the-counter pain medications can relieve mild pain, some people say that wearing migraine sunglasses eased their discomfort in bright lights (especially the sun). Small studies have shown that rose-tinted lenses (or FL-41 lenses) actually reduced people's light sensitivity.
If you're interested in trying these kinds of shades, Zenni's FL-41 migraine lenses come in a variety of affordable, stylish options so you can find the right pair for your budget and enjoy life in all light levels. And just in case you're not totally satisfied with how they look or feel, you can return them for free within 30 days.
TRY A PAIR
 
 
 
 
Advertisement
Made for your relief. Styled for your life.
Say goodbye to light-induced migraine episodes and reclaim your day with Zenni FL-41 Migraine Lenses.
LEARN MORE  →
  Made for your relief. Styled for your life.
 
 
 
 
 
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Thank you for being here with me while I continue to process my childhood in odd and unconventional ways. I wish you all the very best during this complicated time of year!
 
 
 
 
 
Until next time,
healthline
Take care of yourself, and we'll see
you again soon!
 
 
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